Coffee

So Coffee is that socially acceptable addictive drug of choice in many countries.

I'm so down with coffee. It's my buddy.

Even adding this small picture of coffee has me craving coffee at 2PM.

So sad.

But so delicious.

This post isn't meant to feed your additions, it actually has a point. I'm just meandering to the point but stay with me!

Coffee is one of those socially acceptable drinks that is often used for meetings, first dates, after dinner refreshments and is usually offered at every diner, restaurant and eatery known to man. It's for the most part it's also very financially reasonable beverage of choice.

Today's storytime is how best to use a coffee to have hard conversations.

Patty is a widowed retired woman living in Missouri. She has three grown children and five grandchildren. In her free time she volunteers at her church and a local food bank. At a recent doctor's visit her physician suggested that she reduce her stress because some of her numbers were starting to look a bit concerning. Patty never thought she was stressed, but she takes her physician's suggestion to heart and plans a three-day weekend trip out of town in a peaceful retreat to jump-start her "less stressful life".

She calls her church to inform them of her upcoming absence. The secretary is upset and makes her feel bad about the time off because "who else is going to cover the nursery room while your gone?"

She informs her children, who also are dismayed.

"Well if you leave Friday, who will pick up the kids from school and daycare until me and my wife get off work?"

"I was actually hoping to borrow money..."

"I can I stay at your home while you gone while me and my girlfriend figure some things out."

Even Patty's friends aren't initially supportive.

"You're my ride to the food bank"

"Does this mean you aren't baking cookies this week?"

.... the complaints and fussing continue as she makes every single phone call to people in her life. After all is said and done she realizes that maybe, just maybe she was stressed out after all. After reading some boundaries books and talking with a life coach she makes a plan of action.

That plan begins with a cup of coffee with each individual in her life. It's a hard conversation but she makes it clear that her help and assistance is voluntary and if life has recommended that she becomes less committed to things that it would behoove everyone involved to start making that their plan of action.

Within a few weeks she leaves for her new stress free life with a clearer picture and less stress. Her church understands that she will be slowly stepping down from ministry leadership but not fully from volunteering. Her children understand that apart of "adulting" is not relying on the parental figure for essentials. Her friends and volunteer organizations understand things need to be more flexible in her life.